On January 19th—as I prepared for a cacao ceremony which is always different for me because they are inspired by astrological influences of the time depending on what season we are in and what is happening in the transits —I became aware of a powerful Pluto cazimi approaching. A Pluto cazimi is when Pluto and the Sun align, spotlighting hidden truths and pushing for deep transformation. (There’s one happening on January 21, 2025 at 7:28am EST)

That evening, I received an unexpected email from the Ayahuasca community I had been deeply connected with for six years—a place of tremendous learning, growth, and healing; where I met my partner, Tiger, and where the shaman leading the ceremonies was a teacher to me. It was a special place for both of us.

The message informed me we were no longer invited to be part of their ceremonies, because —they said— we were embarking on our own healing journey by offering our own (cacao) ceremonies and launching our Ketamine business and that it was time to share our medicine with the world, separate from them.

As I read the email, my heart sank. My body froze in shock. I could feel the grief settle in my chest, heavy and unmoving, my mind began moving into a gazillion directions trying to make sense of it, as the realization hit me—this chapter of my life was ending. It was truly hard to believe and so painful.

But amidst the pain, there was also a strange sense of trust. What if this was the universe pushing me into the unknown, to expand beyond what I thought possible? As hard as it was to feel, there was a sense I was being guided.

Even in the shock, it felt like some space was being created for something new.

Although I’ve faced similar experiences before—being let go from jobs or cut off by friends—this one hit hard even with all the healing work I’ve done over the years. It was a reminder of how, even with growth, surprises like these can still catch us off guard.

What felt like a heartbreaking loss at the time, I see now, was actually the catalyst for a new path, one that aligns even more deeply with my soul’s purpose.

Through this experience, I found my way to a new community that has opened up space for me to expand, share my gifts, and grow in ways I hadn’t imagined. In ways that I was not able to in the previous community. This expansion led Tiger and me on a trip to Peru in November 2024, where we embarked on a transformative journey into the heart of the Amazon jungle. There, we did our first “Dieta” with a Shipibo Maestro, connecting deeply with the plants and their teachings.

Below is a picture of me and the tree I Dieted, called the Noya Rao. She is known as the “flying tree” and as the “tree of light” because its leaves are bioluminescent at night. This is a story for another day, but I will share that it was one of the most incredible experiences of my life (but not easy!). Having experienced many amazing things, this one truly stands out as life-changing even if I don’t fully know how yet. It feels like the beginning of a new journey we didn’t expect to embark on — they say it takes two years to integrate this diet. I am continuing to be taught how to trust the path ahead, even when it unfolds in mysterious ways.

What seemed like a heartbreak earlier this year, turned into a deeper lesson about trusting the unknown and embracing the flow of change.

I’m sharing this story because I know many of you may have experienced, may experience, or are currently facing similar periods of profound transformation.

We simply cannot avoid soul growth when it is being asked of us, especially when it comes to us from events outside of us (Pluto is known for this!) I’ve experienced this quite a few times throughout my life.

In moments of shock and loss, it can feel like the ground is being pulled from beneath us. Whether it’s losing a community, ending a relationship, or a major life transition, we all face moments where the old must make way for the new.

For me, this was recently losing my long-standing connection with my Ayahuasca community. For you, it might be something different, but the lesson remains: transformation often feels painful, but it opens the door for soul growth.

Interestingly, I discovered that this intense period of transformation aligned with significant astrological transits in my chart—specifically Pluto’s movements in the sky. Pluto is an intense and powerful planet that pushes us to transformation, even when we’re not asking for it. Often when this happens, you can look back and see how its movement in our astrological natal chart is linked to external events that occur that push us to change. It’s inevitable.

While that’s a topic for another day, it reminded me just how powerful astrology can be in helping us understand the cycles of growth and change we experience. Recognizing this has been incredibly helpful for me—it allows me to give these intense moments the space they need. This is why it can be so helpful to learn your chart or have an astrologer look at it, share what they see, and let you know what to look out for.

I’ve learned through this recent experience that transformation can feel like being pushed out of the nest.

And that when we trust the process, we can find ourselves in the exact place we’re meant to be.

Every time I’ve been faced with a major shift, it has pushed me closer to my true path. It’s allowed me to let go of what no longer serves me, creating space for something more aligned to come in.

Reflection & Journaling Prompts

If you’re currently facing a period of transformation, or if you’ve been through one recently, I invite you to take a moment to reflect. Here are some journaling prompts to help guide you:

How do you navigate moments of uncertainty? What helps you trust in the process of transformation, even when it feels uncomfortable?
Reflect on a moment of unexpected change in your life. How did it challenge or transform you? What did you learn about yourself?
Think of a situation where you felt powerless or out of control. How did you respond, and how can you reclaim your personal power?
What are you being called to let go of in your life to create space for something new?
Where in your life are you feeling the pull toward change, and how can you embrace it?
What might be the gift you're receiving from this situation or experience?

Transformation is rarely graceful, but it is a necessary part of our soul’s journey. Even when the changes feel overwhelming, trust that they are leading you toward something more aligned with your truth.

I’d love to hear how transformation is unfolding in your life. What doors are closing, and what new possibilities are opening? Feel free to leave a comment.

❤

If my story resonates, I’d love to help you navigate life’s changes with greater clarity and trust. In a complimentary Embodied Soul Session, we can explore how these shifts are shaping your path, look at your astrology chart for deeper insights, and uncover how I can support you in embracing what’s next. Click here to schedule and learn how I can help you move through this transformation.